Jewish practices of burial and death are constructed around a few key
ideas: death is to be confronted, not denied; the dead body is to be
accorded the utmost respect; mourners are to be comforted; we are equal
in the face of death; the burial and decay of a body is a natural
process which should not be impeded or interrupted.
One in mourning is called an onen – literally, someone in between. They are exempt from all manner of work and social relations so that they can focus their entire effort on caring for the deceased. A corpse, per Jewish law, is treated with the utmost respect, since it once housed a human spirit. Traditionally, a dead person is not left alone from the time of death to burial; shomrim (guardians) watch over it, reciting psalms. A burial society (chevrah kadishah) prepares the body for burial through tahara, ritual washing, and clothing the body in tachrichin (shrouds). Jews are traditionally buried in a plain pine box, so that there is no distinction between rich and poor.
It is customary to hold a funeral as soon as possible following the death. In the United States, a funeral usually takes place in a funeral home or synagogue, and sometimes at graveside. Psalms are recited, along with the memorial prayer, El Maleh Rachamim, and a eulogy. Mourners traditionally tear their garments to outwardly express their inner state; many people today tear a small black ribbon which they wear on their clothing during shiva. Close family members proceed to the cemetery for the internment.
Jews are customarily buried in the ground – “from dust to dust.” It is a great mitzvah to accompany a casket to the grave and to share in the digging of the grave. Usually, shovels are available, and mourners take turns shoveling dirt onto the coffin.
There is no sound like that of the first clumps of dirt hitting the coffin. Death is final and there is no pretense – fake lawn covering, open coffin – to deny the reality of this moment. A special kaddish, or mourner’s prayer, is recited at the graveside.
Contemporary Practices
Traditional burial and funeral practices assume the presence of an intact Jewish community complete with a burial society. For many modern Jews, this is simply not their reality. Jewish funeral homes, however, can and will arrange for shomrim, tahara, tachrichin, and a plain pine box, if requested to do so. More and more synagogues today, in a push-back to the rapacious practices of some funeral homes, have created their own chevra kadisha.
It has become increasingly common to have several people, including family members and friends, eulogize the deceased. This creates a more personal funeral. This can be a lovely practice though no one should feel pressured to assume such a role if he is not emotionally prepared to do so.
Controversy often arises with respect to:
Cremation
The halachic prohibition against cremation is absolute. Burial returns the body to its source. In the wake of the Holocaust, many Jews feel additional revulsion at the notion of burning Jewish bodies. That said, there are those who insist upon it. A Jewish funeral home will arrange for cremation and provide a container for the ashes. Many rabbis are unwilling to officiate at a funeral home when a cremation occurs. All other practices of mourning are still observed, and the bereaved are to be comforted like all other mourners.
Embalming, Viewing the Body, and Wakes
Attempts to defy the forces of nature or deny death generally run counter to Jewish tradition. Therefore, embalming is generally prohibited since it is a process which prevents natural decay. Exceptions are made for funerals which must be postponed for a lengthy period or bodies which are transported overseas.
Jewish funerals are always conducted with a closed coffin and there is not a period in which mourners come to view the deceased. However, in some cases, family members traveling from far away and unable to be present at the time of death may request a private viewing.
A wake is antithetical to Jewish tradition. Mourners, prior to the funeral, must attend to the details of the funeral and are not expected to receive guests, nor is it appropriate to have the body on display. The purpose of shiva, held after the funeral, is to comfort the mourners.
by Rabbi Rona Shapiro
One in mourning is called an onen – literally, someone in between. They are exempt from all manner of work and social relations so that they can focus their entire effort on caring for the deceased. A corpse, per Jewish law, is treated with the utmost respect, since it once housed a human spirit. Traditionally, a dead person is not left alone from the time of death to burial; shomrim (guardians) watch over it, reciting psalms. A burial society (chevrah kadishah) prepares the body for burial through tahara, ritual washing, and clothing the body in tachrichin (shrouds). Jews are traditionally buried in a plain pine box, so that there is no distinction between rich and poor.
It is customary to hold a funeral as soon as possible following the death. In the United States, a funeral usually takes place in a funeral home or synagogue, and sometimes at graveside. Psalms are recited, along with the memorial prayer, El Maleh Rachamim, and a eulogy. Mourners traditionally tear their garments to outwardly express their inner state; many people today tear a small black ribbon which they wear on their clothing during shiva. Close family members proceed to the cemetery for the internment.
Jews are customarily buried in the ground – “from dust to dust.” It is a great mitzvah to accompany a casket to the grave and to share in the digging of the grave. Usually, shovels are available, and mourners take turns shoveling dirt onto the coffin.
There is no sound like that of the first clumps of dirt hitting the coffin. Death is final and there is no pretense – fake lawn covering, open coffin – to deny the reality of this moment. A special kaddish, or mourner’s prayer, is recited at the graveside.
Contemporary Practices
Traditional burial and funeral practices assume the presence of an intact Jewish community complete with a burial society. For many modern Jews, this is simply not their reality. Jewish funeral homes, however, can and will arrange for shomrim, tahara, tachrichin, and a plain pine box, if requested to do so. More and more synagogues today, in a push-back to the rapacious practices of some funeral homes, have created their own chevra kadisha.
It has become increasingly common to have several people, including family members and friends, eulogize the deceased. This creates a more personal funeral. This can be a lovely practice though no one should feel pressured to assume such a role if he is not emotionally prepared to do so.
Controversy often arises with respect to:
Cremation
The halachic prohibition against cremation is absolute. Burial returns the body to its source. In the wake of the Holocaust, many Jews feel additional revulsion at the notion of burning Jewish bodies. That said, there are those who insist upon it. A Jewish funeral home will arrange for cremation and provide a container for the ashes. Many rabbis are unwilling to officiate at a funeral home when a cremation occurs. All other practices of mourning are still observed, and the bereaved are to be comforted like all other mourners.
Embalming, Viewing the Body, and Wakes
Attempts to defy the forces of nature or deny death generally run counter to Jewish tradition. Therefore, embalming is generally prohibited since it is a process which prevents natural decay. Exceptions are made for funerals which must be postponed for a lengthy period or bodies which are transported overseas.
Jewish funerals are always conducted with a closed coffin and there is not a period in which mourners come to view the deceased. However, in some cases, family members traveling from far away and unable to be present at the time of death may request a private viewing.
A wake is antithetical to Jewish tradition. Mourners, prior to the funeral, must attend to the details of the funeral and are not expected to receive guests, nor is it appropriate to have the body on display. The purpose of shiva, held after the funeral, is to comfort the mourners.
by Rabbi Rona Shapiro
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